Muffins V.s Cupcakes

Hi, my name is Will and I stole this speech in
hoping that you realise that muffins and cupcakes are in fact, different and
that they have feelings. This Speech is NOT a joke it is a true document that I
stole from the Pentagon’s secure files.

We all love muffins and cupcakes but please
remember that they have feelings too, they do not mind being eaten as long as
you prey to their god Flourero and that you thank them for all they are about to
achieve.

The Cupcake: It by definition is a small cake baked in a cup-shaped container and
typically iced. So it’s small and cute with nice colours and
flavours. They are also the babies of the cake
world, but also the cutest. A cupcake is usually vanilla flavoured but the
colours, frosting and decorations make the cupcake unique and special. Their
lifestyle includes cooling, being decorated and depending on the intention of
the cupcake it could be displayed or eaten. If the cupcake lives long enough
they could grow into a fully-fledged muffin but that is a very rare thing to
happen.

The Muffin: By definition a small domed cake or quick bread made from
batter or dough. The muffin is a wise and tough species their rough exterior
showing nothing of their delicious centre. When muffin is said I think warm and chocolaty but can typically contain berries or chocolate, usually not a fluffy as a cupcake. It is also quite a bit bigger than a cupcake and doesn’t usually have icing. As much as I hate to say it muffins can be savoury but the same cannot be said for the cupcake.

Twice underneath maths,


There wasn’t a fat she male called Josh. She didn’t eat donuts or
Euans from the duck pond, and she most certainly didn’t like guys or females
he/she liked his soft teddy bear named Renob. He/she would not do anything for
Renob.


One day Renob started choking on a grape, so Josh started
  throwing Renob around the room trying to free Renob from the terrible curse of
  choking. But all that did was lodge the grape further in his throat.



The next day was Renob’s Funeral. The service lasted 2 whole
  minutes before Josh stated pole dancing on the coffin. Josh lived a very happy
  life until he got sucked into a worm hole that opened into another dimension 30
  seconds later.


The End